Kiddy consumerism

Faced with an overflowing toy box and fistfuls of receipts for baby gym classes, British mother Hattie Garlick committed to not buying anything for her toddler for a year. Rejecting kiddy consumerism is the subject of her blog, and she’s documenting the clothing swaps, no-cost activities and lack of store-bought baby purees over at freeourkids.co.uk.

This article about her experience made me think about how money and consumption could affect how I raise Peeper.

We don’t spend a ton of money on our daughter, in part because we just don’t have disposable income. Almost everything she owns and wears is either a hand-me-down or a gift. We buy throwaway diapers (reusables intimidate the hell out of me for some reason!), but they’re just about the only Edie-related expense we have, aside from the occasional necessity.

When we traveled to the East Coast in the fall, Peeper wore a sleeper given to us by a friend when I was still pregnant. “Handsome boy,” read a little label on it. The flight attendants got a kick out of it when we pointed out that our baby was actually a girl, and I still think the moment was funny.

Second-hand clothes may lose some of their humor when Peeper gets older, though.

My family didn’t have a ton of money when I was young. We shopped at resale stores, so I wasn’t always up on the latest trends.

I remember trying to hide my off-brand Keds under the school bus seat and the cheek-burning embarrassment when my used Hypercolor t-shirt didn’t actually change colors. Sometimes it was hard to not fit in.

Raising a child who isn’t materialistic or spoiled is important. But I’d hate to subject my loved one to unnecessary ridicule. Surely there’s a balance to be struck here.

I have plenty of time before kids at play dates look askance at my daughter’s wardrobe. But projects like Garlick’s make me think about how we’ll one day handle the protestations of “But everyone else has one!”

How do you teach your kids to do without? Do you find yourself spending a lot on your kids? Do you feel guilty when you don’t?

What motherhood has taught me

Motherhood is much harder than I thought it would be—but not in the clichéd ways you hear about before giving birth. I could care less about changing a million diapers, no matter their contents. That’s a breeze.

Even giving birth was a totally different kind of difficult.

What I found was that the challenges and trials of early motherhood were intense and awful enough to make me question my fitness as a mother.

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Staring down six months

Every month, I take stock of the milestones and changes I have seen in Edie over the previous 30 days or so. I always marvel at how much more grown up she is, the new things she can do and what she’s trying to master. Marking each month’s “birthday” is a way for me to keep track of time and celebrate her accomplishments.

Edie will be six months old in a few days. I’m excited, in awe (how is she almost a half a year already?) and ready to try new things, like feeding her solid food. But I’m also feeling down because of the approaching landmark.

I thought things would be easier by this point.

Edie hates car rides, too. I went through a mountain of toys to appease her on our latest trip to Eugene.
Edie hates car rides, too. I went through a mountain of toys to appease her on our latest trip to Eugene.

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Swearing off parenting advice

I’m considering an early New Year’s resolution: to not read any more parenting articles online.

I just finished this one, about what babies need, and I’m pissed. While it’s probably mostly right, it also makes me feel judged. I’m so sick of hearing how stopping breastfeeding before the kid is a year old will make her ill, how sleeping in another room will cause her to become malnourished, or how doing any number of things wrong will “undermine their trust of others, their health and social wellbeing, and lead to self-centered morality which can do much destruction to the world.”

This article isn’t the only one of its kind. As a mom, I feel as if I am constantly bombarded with messages saying I am not doing enough, or what I am doing is wrong.

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